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everyone is so afraid of bloggers with a ton of followers even tho they probably dropped pudding on their shirt today


what are cock rings for? is that how gays get engaged?

My visit to get screened for cancer:

Nurse:  "Sorry your boyfriend couldn't wait for you in the waiting room, it makes women feel uncomfortable."
Me:  "He wasn't my boyfriend and I don't see how it would make them uncomfortable, but that's my opinion. He was here for moral support. I understood, and so does he."
Nurse:  "So he's your...."
Me:  "Friend."
Nurse:  (During the question asking) "How many sexual partners have you had?"
Me:  "11."
Nurse:  "How old were you when you first became sexually active?"
Me:  "....Loaded question but....14, I guess."
Nurse:  "You're sexually active, then."
Me:  "Well....I guess...but..."
Nurse:  "How many times have you been pregnant?"
Me:  "Uh. 0."
Nurse:  "O...kayy...-Checks 'condoms' as my preferred use of birth control-"
Me:  "I don't use condoms. Or take birth control."
Nurse:  "Then how do you avoid getting pregnant?"
Me:  "With homosexuality."
Me:  "I fuck girls."